It has been a hot minute hasn’t it?

Days and weeks have gone by since I last posted here on the blog, maybe you’ve been wondering what the HECK happened to me.

Did she just disappear? Did she forget all about me? Did she just up and abandon her community? What is wrong with her?

Funnily enough, you might not have even noticed and that is completely understandable.

In my mind though I had this deep sense that these were the thoughts going through your mind.

I created this story that you were terribly disappointed in me.

Even writing this post I can see how silly those thoughts are but, in that moment, it all felt very real to me.

That’s the thing about our thoughts sometimes, they can take us on a wild journey, feeding us empaths a bunch or stories that are so outlandish and unlikely.

Yet, we still believe them, almost wholeheartedly and without question.

Part of that comes from the conditioning we’ve received from Supposed to Culture – the idea that we need to always be analytical and logical.

Translation – trust your thoughts and your mind, they are your truth.

INCORRECT!!!

In actual fact, focusing in on what our thoughts are is the very thing that gets us empaths spinning out of control and feeling like the sky is falling or the world is ending.

Truth be told, our thoughts and how we process information hasn’t evolved much.

It’s still living in the bloody stone ages, where considering every possible worst case scenario was a matter of life and death.

And that is where a lot of anxiety tends to be based and rooted in, thoughts running wild and presenting you with 32789563748623487634 reasons you won’t be okay, why you aren’t safe, why you need to hunker down and avoid the world.

To top is all off, you feel this as a bodily reaction, with physical sensations (tight chest, racing heart, sweaty palms).

Half of the battle with your brain is knowing when it’s trying to protect you from something it perceives as dangerous.

See how I focused on the word “perceives?” The brain can’t tell the difference between something is THINKS is a danger and something that ACTUALLY is a danger.

It’s like thinking you’re being chased by a lion vs. actually being chased by a lion – the brain processes it like it’s actually been happening.

So what do you do? How do you begin to manage these racing and intrusive thoughts? What is the solution?

You have to become a bit of a brain detective, becoming more mindful of what thoughts are coming up for you and how your body feels when you’re thinking it.

Now, keep in mind, you think upwards of 60,000 thoughts per day so this is going to take practice.

To start, set the intention to be more mindful of your thoughts, just for the day:

STEP 1 – Notice the ones that are negative, write them down without judgement

STEP 2 – Ask yourself “what am I scared of here?”

STEP 3 – Write down “what is the root of this fear?”

STEP 4 – Ask yourself “is this something to actually be fearful of or is this something I have conditioned myself to believe?

STEP 5 – Challenge the thoughts, feed them evidence that the complete opposite is true.

In my case, I had the all these thoughts that I was somehow letting my community down by taking some much needed time away from Social Media.

I felt like a failure and that is what I was scared of most of all.

What was at the root of that? The pressure I have always felt to hustle and go go go as a woman. Couple that with my dad always being hard on me and seeking perfection. It was a recipe for disaster!

Ultimately, when I took time to reflect, taking time off was triggering me and I had the opportunity to go inwards and find the source. These were never my own values, I was experiencing fear because of what I had been taught during childhood.

When it came time to feed my brain new information I simply looked to all of the messages I had received from the community commending me on taking rest.

Rinse and repeat for the entire time I was away – these thoughts were pesky and it took some commitment to manage them.

Either way, I wanted to use this experience as an opportunity to inspire you to be a brain detective.

Do you struggle with negative thoughts that feel really intrusive? Drop a comment below and let me know what you’re working on.